not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
he shaved USA in his pubs
i think i have two assholes
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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