Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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