he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The uberlube is also flammable
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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