He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
