your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
We named our party play list daddy issues
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
i drank out of a bidet.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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