Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
