I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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