we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
