Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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