i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
