Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I need water and some morals
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
