hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I don't think brook has ever known best
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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