Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
