i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
