You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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