I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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