The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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