Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He? As in you personified your dick?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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