so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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