I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
