Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
