Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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