They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
