I just saw a hot homeless man
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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