yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
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