How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
