Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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