we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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