Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
