And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
