she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize