I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize