The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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