First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
