I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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