here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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