You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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