Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
