How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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