she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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