READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
her facebook's as public as her vagina
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
