she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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