Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
i need some magic done to my vagina
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
