Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize