Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize
