i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
So. Much. Porn.
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