Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize