the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
