I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
