OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
