ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
