He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
