white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize